Ok you all know I've been "dabbling" in economic development over the past couple of decades or so. Had some pretty awesome achievements if I do say so. Ran a successful Chamber of Commerce, on the northwest coast of Beerish Columbia. Made "the Band" a cool million on the island. Even managed an office for the largest private construction company north of 60. It has been an adventure. A career thats taken me from the financial district of Vancouver to the Alberta foothills to tropical paradise of the Caribbean.
To quote the ever self affirming mensch in the blue sweater, Stewart Smalley, "I'm good enough, I'm smart enough and dog gonnit, people like me." So have I become a people pleaser? Am I, as a good friend accused me "too nice. Stop being so damn nice" It's cause to self assess and figure out where I've gone astray.
Now I'm no dummy, but I sense in myself some wide swaths of Freakin Oblivious. And I may have mentioned this in previous posts, but once in a blue moon God comes and Smacks me in the head before I go "Oohhhh Never saw it that way before". D'oh!
So Smack...I'm now gainfully unemployed. I was shocked! Embarrassed! How to tell my hubby? My family? Friends? Business clients? Well how shocked was I, when the responses were supportive, people saying You look great! Or "what were they thinking letting you go?" Kind of the reassurance I crave. I know, I thrive on the praise of others, I need pats on the back. Because I'm too nice! lol Kind of sad when I say it out loud.
So whats next in the Big Book O Marlean? Im gonna jump...and become (brace yourself) a consultant! Armed with enthusiasm, a cell phone and a huge network of those smarter than I, I wanna make my mark, and have a good time.
This morning, as I was motoring down the highway I had another Smack moment. D'oh a consultant can travel to appointments on her bike! Uhuh. Now we're cooking with gas. I've been pondering this - how can I get paid to ride my bike!! This might be it! Next step, register my company name..MacArthur Park Group, Marilyn MacArthur Team Leader. My team? Husband and a cast of hundreds!
I'm excited! I feel my mojo coming back, after a 6 month retreat.
To lose the joy of my career was a bigger destroyer of self confidence than I cared to admit to myself. Thank God it only took a couple of Smacks to bring my thinking around. I'm gonna rock! Gonna take a bit of work, but I'm feeling very Mary Tyler Moore!
If I had a tam, I'd toss it in the air and do a wee twirl.
I never understand it when people say you are ‘too nice’. Being nice is not bad, never has been. It is the way that society treats nice people that is bad. The main disadvantage of being nice is that generally society sees niceness as being a sign of weakness (it is not). Being nice is a character trait and a rare one, and a jolly awesome one when many friendships these days are becoming less selfless and more selfish.
ReplyDeleteI too am often accused of being ‘too nice’ and ‘too trusting’, and because of it I am often hurt and disappointed by those around me. I have to remember that is their fault, not mine. I cannot control what others say or how they behave, I can only control how I react to their disrespect. Be nice but work on your armour.
Being ‘nice’ is not a defect my friend it is one of the things I admire most about you. Please don’t try and change. Be nice to all people, but don’t trust them. Expect niceness in return, and if you don’t get it move along, if they can’t respect you then they don’t deserve your attention.
Think of all the advantages of being nice – people want to be around you, you feel good, you are a go-to person in time of need, you are open and honest and who wouldn’t want to be you?
Thank you Finulla, and the song? Its the tam- twirl & toss at the end...hubby used to say that was me coming from small town Saskatchewan to downtown Vancouver! Love you too.
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